1 Corinthians 7:29-31

I am without words, so I cry and moaned the expressions of my heart... only by God's grace that all blessings come from.

The older I get, I realized that I learn to block certain things from my head, much like going into the reality of denial or ignorance. I say this in light of having to find myself narrowed in my views to endure through what I would fear over. So I have conditioned my mind to adjust to the changes in such a way of deception or cover, as someone dear to me describe it as a change in reality, one which I am finding it hard to to adjust other than to deceive myself about the the change that is taking place.

We treasure many things in life, some bigger things than others. And for those that we treasure the most determines out hearts direction, even as the bible says that where our treasure is, that is where our hearts would be also...

So as I reflect on these thoughts, I am desiring so much to be drowned into the treasure of my heart, but which treasure would that be? Which is the biggest and precious treasure of my heart? So I have to admit to the deceptions of my heart that the one true treasure that I am suppose to go after is not the right one. In other words, my priority is not in check with the cost of being a disciple of Christ. Luke 14 spoke of the sacrifice of our earthly treasure is necessary to be counted worthy as a disciple of Christ, and I must say that today I had to re-evaluate my treasures of my heart and surrender to God what is due to Him... my heart, my life and my will.

Typing these words prove rather difficult for me. To live out this life as His follower has its tests to filter through my deepest motivations and intentions. I realized how much more pathetic I am in light of all that I preach to others about, yet the challenge still stands to my fulfillment. I can be such a hypocrite.

Thus, I am trying to bring myself into a place of surrender with God again, and find myself realigning my focus that I may have been robbing God of.

So glory to God in all His sovereignty and may He bless us according to His will as we seek after it with everything we have.